The idea of (re)marriage never crossed my mind after my divorce. Not that I don’t believe in love, I just thought loving someone for the rest of one’s life was a huge commitment that even I, myself, was not sure I could uphold. Love is incredibly strong and yet extremely fragile. One minute you could be madly blindly in love, the next you couldn’t bear to spend another minute in the same room with him/her. I’ve seen the most passionate lovers turned into the worst enemies. Frankly, it baffles me sometimes why people have to be so mean to each other. Love needs nurturing for it to grow. People change and feelings change. It’s important for a couple to work at growing old together so they don’t grow apart.
When I first met Allen over 13 years ago (via Match.com), I didn’t have any expectation of finding a life-long partner. Our attraction was immediate but not without some struggles. For the most part, it was our culture differences. It took a few months and many long communications (with a few break-ups and make-ups) to work out the misunderstanding. And if I say life was smooth sailing after that, I’d be lying. There were many challenges we had to overcome. Along the way, we promised each other we would never give up on our love and that we’d give it CPR if it went into cardiac arrest. Fortunately, our love for each other was deep enough that we were able to learn from our mistakes and grow stronger and closer as a couple through the years.
My friends asked me what it was about Allen that attracted me? I told them it was his ability to make me laugh. No matter how bad a day I have had, I can come home to him and he always manages to make me smile. In his arm, I feel safe and warm. He listens and always makes me feel understood. In his eyes, I feel beautiful.
When people learned about our long 9-year engagement, first thing they asked was ‘When are you getting married?’ We often looked at each other and just shrugged our shoulders. I had told Allen I never wanted to get married again. He proposed anyway because he wanted a more formal relationship. I had said ‘No’ twice, but on the 3rd time, I said ‘Yes’. My thoughts were that IF I were ever to marry anyone, I would marry him.
So on 12/12, in pouring rain (I guess God was very happy for us, he cried), we went down to Orange County Clerk-Recorder’s office in Fullerton. With my daughter and son as our witnesses, we became husband and wife! We both teared up as the officiant read us the wedding ceremony vows. I never expected to be so emotional, but I was. It was a simple, intimate, but PERFECT ceremony!
I love you, Allen Lee Taylor, my husband, my world! This is my Wendyful World!
(P. S. All photos by Jessica Lee/Allen Taylor of Allen Taylor Photography.)